⏱️ 8 min read
Introduction: How my decluttering journey was shaped by the best in the field
When I first started decluttering, I did what most people do—I looked for advice from the best experts in the field. And wow, did I find a lot of perspectives! From extreme minimalism to perfectly curated organizing tips and systems, there was no shortage of methods to choose from.
But here’s the thing: No single approach fit me perfectly.
I struggled with decluttering—not just physically but emotionally and mentally. Some methods felt too rigid, others assumed I could make quick decisions, and none of them fully addressed the challenges of ADHD, perfectionism, or feeling completely overwhelmed.
That’s why I created Simply Tidy Living. I needed a decluttering framework that takes the best of what I learned from these experts and refines it into something flexible, practical, and sustainable for different personality types.
What you’ll learn in this post
I want to share the thought leaders who shaped my thinking and exactly what I learned from each of them—so you don’t have to piece it all together like I did.
Struggling to figure out which decluttering style best fits you? Take the Four Flames Quiz and get personalized decluttering help!
Decluttering & Organizing Experts Who Changed My Perspective
Marie Kondo’s “spark joy” method: A great idea (but is it sustainable?)
Best Known For: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up and the “spark joy” philosophy
Marie Kondo changed the way we think about decluttering—focusing not on what to discard, but on what’s truly worth keeping. Her idea of keeping only what “sparks joy” was a mindset shift for me.
I felt an instant dopamine hit as I decided which clothes to keep or discard (with thanks). I was so hooked on the process that I hyperfocused on decluttering my entire closet in a weekend, donating hundreds of items of clothing I no longer needed.
But while I love the concept, I quickly learned that joy alone wasn’t enough, and hyperfocusing on decluttering like this can lead to some serious burnout. ADHD, decision fatigue, and guilt often clouded my ability to decide what truly belonged in my life.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Being mindful of what stays in my life is just as important as what I choose to release.
Dana K. White’s “container concept”: A practical approach to decluttering
Best Known For: Decluttering at the Speed of Life and A Slob Comes Clean
Dana K. White is the realistic, no-nonsense decluttering expert I didn’t know I needed. Unlike Kondo, she acknowledges that clutter often builds up not because we aren’t intentional, but because life happens.
Her “container concept” changed how I approach clutter:
- Instead of deciding what to get rid of, decide what fits in your space.
- No endless decision-making, just practical limits.
In the past, I would get larger (or more) containers to hold the stuff I wanted to keep. The lightbulb went off when I began considering what actually works in my space and sticking within that limit.
While her method simplifies decision-making, it doesn’t fully address the unique struggles of ADHD brains—like object permanence, decision fatigue, and overwhelm. That’s where Simply Tidy Living takes things further with an ADHD-friendly approach designed for how our brains actually work.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Low-pressure decluttering works better than perfectionism (though ADHD declutterers need even more structure and support).
Cassandra Aarssen’s Personality-Based Organizing: The Missing Piece
Best Known For: The Clutterbug Method and personality-based organizing
I was first introduced to personality-based organizing through Cassandra Aarssen’s Clutterbug system, which helped me recognize that not everyone thinks about home organization the same way. If you’ve ever felt like traditional advice doesn’t fit, you’ll love the Four Flames Quiz.
Her work heavily inspired my own Four Flames Decluttering Personalities. I realized that decluttering needed to be personalized—some people need visual reminders, some need structure, some thrive with minimalism, and others need flexibility.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Not all decluttering advice works for everyone—your personality matters.
KC Davis: Shame-free, ADHD-friendly cleaning & home maintenance
Best Known For: How to Keep House While Drowning
If you struggle to keep up with decluttering, it’s NOT a personal failure—it’s how your brain is wired. You don’t need a ‘perfect’ system. You just need a system that works for you. I’ve definitely been there. KC Davis completely transformed how I think about maintaining a home.
Instead of seeing cleaning and decluttering as moral successes or failures, she frames them as functional acts of care. For those of us who struggle with ADHD, executive dysfunction, or just plain exhaustion, KC’s approach removes the shame and replaces it with compassion and sustainability.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Your home is a tool, not a test of your worth.
Minimalism & Simplicity Thought Leaders
The Minimalists: Does less really mean more?
Best Known For: The Minimalists Podcast and Minimalism: A Documentary
Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus—the duo behind The Minimalists—taught me that decluttering isn’t just about removing stuff. It’s about creating a life that aligns with your values.
However, I found that their approach was challenging for families and neurodivergent thinkers, and people who aren’t seeking a minimalist lifestyle. I wanted to take their message of intentionality and adapt it for people who need a more flexible approach.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Less is only better if it aligns with your lifestyle.
Gretchen Rubin: The link between clutter & happiness
Best Known For: The Happiness Project and Outer Order, Inner Calm
I’ve followed Gretchen Rubin since before she wrote The Happiness Project, when she was still making habit trackers to try to get better at healthy habits. I downloaded them and printed them off—and forgot to fill them in—right alongside her.
Gretchen’s research since those days shows that a clear home leads to less stress, more focus, and greater happiness.
She also helped me understand that people are motivated in different ways (Upholders, Obligers, Questioners, and Rebels). This insight helped refine the Four Flames framework by acknowledging that different people need different motivation styles to succeed.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Clutter isn’t just physical—it’s emotional and mental too.
Behavioral Science & ADHD-Friendly Experts
Dr. Russell Barkley: Why traditional decluttering fails ADHD brains
Best Known For: Groundbreaking ADHD research on executive dysfunction
Dr. Barkley’s work helped me understand why ADHD brains struggle with clutter. Object permanence, decision fatigue, and executive dysfunction make traditional decluttering advice ineffective for neurodivergent people, which means we need a decluttering system that works with our brain—not against it.
✅ My Key Takeaway: Traditional decluttering methods don’t account for executive dysfunction.
Dr. Kelly McGonigal: Why decision fatigue makes decluttering exhausting
Best Known For: The Willpower Instinct
Dr. McGonigal’s research into decision fatigue helped me understand why people get stuck while decluttering. Every item is a choice, and too many choices = mental exhaustion.
This insight is woven into Simply Tidy Living, where I focus on removing unnecessary decisions and making decluttering easier with a layered approach to decision-making.
✅ My Key Takeaway: The fewer decisions, the better.
How Simply Tidy Living Brings It All Together
Each of these experts shaped my approach, but I saw a gap—a need for a system that integrates the best of their insights while adapting to different personalities, ADHD struggles, and real-world life challenges.
That’s why I built The Four Flames Decluttering Method—so no one else had to struggle through the trial and error I did.
It combines:
🔥 Personality-based decluttering (inspired by Cassandra Aarssen)
🔥 ADHD-friendly, shame-free strategies (pioneered by KC Davis & Dr. Barkley)
🔥 Flexible minimalism & intentional living (influenced by The Minimalists)
🔥 Decision-fatigue reduction techniques (established by Dr. McGonigal & Dana K. White)
If you’re feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to start, check out my post on exactly where to begin when clutter feels like too much.
Final Thoughts: Who Has Shaped Your Journey?
These experts helped me transform my approach to decluttering and simplifying. Now, I’d love to hear from you!
Who has shaped your approach to decluttering? Drop a comment below and let’s build a resource list of the best decluttering wisdom together!
🚀 Let’s build a movement that makes decluttering easier for EVERYONE.
